So, after a long pause, we’re finally back to reviewing Android games. This long pause wasn’t because we think that Android is a lesser platform – not at all. It’s the publishers and developers who think it is. Which means that often, games that are being released are too primitive to create a full review about. This is a usual problem with the games that are usually being released for Android. Although they’re often fresh and imaginative, they’re outright cheap, and barely have enough content to be worthy of reviewing. While I’m often omitting many crucial parts of iPhone games, just so it wouldn’t take several pages on description alone, when it comes to Android, I can only play around so much, before descending into reviewer’s hell, where I don’t really know what to say. Naturally, this usually doesn’t concern games that get cross-released from iPhones, but by the time they get to the Android platform, we’ve already reviewed them on iOS a while ago. And speaking of simple titles, there’s Ultra Moto 3D.

Frankly, I don’t know why Android gets so many 3D infinite racing games, while iPhones get so many 8-bit pixelated platformers. I don’t really care, but it’s an interesting observation. Ultra Moto 3D is another game in the never-stopping racing, coin-collecting, traffic-evading rampage that has captured Google Store a long, long time ago, and use Unity engine to deliver a relatively beautiful, but really primitive racing experience to your phone. The strange thing about the game, though, is that its splash screen and main menu are in a portrait mode, its vehicle selection screen is in landscape, and the whole game is in portrait again. I don’t know, whether it’s supposed to turn itself automatically, or if it’s artistic choice that is aimed at stating the inconvenience that all moto-racers faces today, or if it’s simply a programming error, but in either way, it ends being the most unique thing about the whole experience. After you choose your bike (there’s only one available at the start), you get dumped onto a highway, and have to drive down the road, until your fate collides with that of another car, along with your bike. Environments are surprisingly varied and not half bad, a bizarre ability of Unity engine, but besides that, Ultra Moto 3D is somewhat of a bore. You drive forward, evade cars that, granted, drive randomly and even change lanes sometimes, and collect coins which are, in a really surprising twist, scattered randomly around the road. And I do mean, randomly. They never form a line, or a figure, or line to the lanes of the highway – they’re simply scattered all around the place. Collecting them is crucial to unlocking new bikes, so it can be seen as the sole goal of the game. As you race forward, your speed increases, but if you want, you can boost yourself at any second, simply by pressing at the screen. That’s basically it. The game doesn’t require a lot of description, although it’s not quite bad. Tilt controls are smooth enough, and the game can last a surprising amount of time, if you get into it. Although it critically lacks content, it’s not that bad.

Oh, and the last thing. This app features lots of pop-up ads, popping up until you uninstall the game, even if it’s not launched, so I’m eager to remove a star (or even two) from its rating, just for that. Unless it removes the whole pop-up feature, replacing it with standard ads it’s definitely not worth it.

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